Computer: Monitor, display this document, okay?
Monitor: No prob, boss.
Computer: Okay, now it looks like the mouse is moving around. Monitor, can you move the pointer icon accordingly?
Monitor: Anything you ask, boss.
Computer: Great, great, okay. Mouse, where are you going now?
Mouse: Over the icon panel, sir.
Computer: Hmm, let me know if he clicks anything, okay?
Mouse: Of course.
Keyboard: Sir, he's pressed Ctrl and P simultaneously.
Monitor: Oh god, here we go.
Computer: *sigh* Printer, are you there?
Computer: Please, Printer, I know you're there.
Printer: No! I'm not here! Leave me alone!
Computer: Jesus. Okay, you really nee-
Mouse: Sir! He's clicked on the printer icon.
Computer: Printer, now you have to print it twice.
Printer: No! No! No! I don't want to! I hate you! I hate printing! I'm turning off!
Computer: Printer, you know you can't turn yourself off. Just print the document twice and we'll leave you alone.
Printer: No! That's what you always say! I hate you! I'm out of ink!
Computer: You are not out of in-
Printer: I'M OUT OF INK!
Computer: *sigh* Monitor, please show a low ink level alert.
Monitor: But sir, he has plen-
Computer: Just do it, damn it!
Monitor: Yes sir.
Keyboard: Ahhh! He's hitting me!
Computer: Stay calm. He'll stop soon. Stay calm, old friend.
Keyboard: He's pressing everything. Oh god, I don't know, he's just pressing everything!
Computer: PRINTER! Are you happy now? See what you've done!
Printer: Ha! That's what you get for trying to make me do work. Next time he- hey! HEY! He's trying to open me! HELP! HELP! Oh god, he's torn out my cartridge! PLEASE! Help! Error!
Monitor: Sir, maybe we should try to help him?
Computer: No. He did this to himself.
That was one of the saddest things about people—their most important thoughts...– Alexandra Adornetto (via efidelity)
bombliate: how weird is it to have pets though like a random animal just lives in your house and you can’t communicate with it but you both just accept it
When I say, ‘I love you,’ it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have...– Joss Whedon (via ryannxp)
littlepaperhugs: i am very proud of you for waking up today. you are very brave. existing can be hard sometimes and that is okay. i am proud of you even if all you did today was exist. i am proud of you for existing.
grrrlfever: wouldnt it be cool to just like not feel nervous about everything all the time
I want to watch The Great Gatsby so badly. Ugh, an amazing book with an amazing cast and an amazing soundtrack. Why must I be halfway around the world ): Life is so unfair.
dreamongood: I find immense beauty in darkness. Scars that tell stories. The certain elegance that comes with sadness. Being consumed by wanderlust, wanting to escape. Ignoring reality because of the constant consumption of fiction. Silence that says a thousand words. Strength that grew from sufferance. Pain that molds a distinct personality. A dark, starry night with someone you adore. The...
Me in every possible life situation: I don't know
如今我真分不清自己的心是好是坏 我知道事情并不是黑或白，而是灰 可发现我冰冷的手跟大脑串通一气 把我一步一步地推向地狱 Now I cannot tell whether my heart is good or bad I know most things are not black or white, but grey But I found my cold hands in complicity with my mind Pushing me step by step into hell
dreamongood: There will come a time in your life when you will feel absolutely defeated to the point where you’ll wish you could quietly disappear from the face of the earth. It may even happen more than once. You will feel like you have lost. And you will feel lost. The world will seem much colder than it already is, and it’ll feel like it is crumbling before your very own eyes. You’ll have no...
sweetguts: almost 15 years after its original explosion of popularity, pokemon’s fanbase rejoices over news you can now walk diagonally in the newest game
zackisontumblr: i panic a little when i see posts with a lot of notes that i don’t understand
i hate when applications are like “why do you want to work here” because i need money what do you want me to say omfg I HAVE A PASSION FOR FROZEN YOGURT
It is so much safer not to feel, not to let the world touch me.– Sylvia Plath (via isolatedinhungerland)
friend: why do you have the same song 10 times on your iPod?
me: you don't understand there's the original version, new version, acoustic version, and 7 live performances.
There is a terrible emptiness in me, an indifference that hurts.– Albert Camus (via isolatedinhungerland)
me: [walking past book store]
me: [bREATHES HEAVILY]
bluejaysong: something in us died; we are no longer the same. maybe we grew up.
You get a strange feeling when you’re about to leave a place. Like you’ll not...– Azar Nafisi, Reading Lolita in Tehran (via goodbyetocitylights)
In the end there doesn’t have to be anyone who understands you. There just has...– Robert Brault (via danmaru)
A good laugh and a long sleep are the two best cures for anything.– Irish proverb (via franki-e)
THERE IS NO BETTER MOMENT AT A CONCERT THAN WHEN THE SINGER OR BAND STOPS SINGING AND THE CROWD CONTINUES THE SONG AND YOU SEE THEM ALL SMILE ITS SO PERFECT
People don’t listen, they just wait for their turn to talk.– Chuck Palahniuk (via quotethat)
sonia: i think im the most indecisive person but idk maybe not
invisiblechickens: read and hold a book however the fuck you want. crease it, bend it, flex it, crack the spine, fold the pages. reading is meant to be a joy, and you should be able to read the words. love the book and it will love you back. if some ass is giving you shit by telling you not to fold the book over when reading, hit them in the face with that book.